Just Keep Asking

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Just Keep Asking

 “Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.” – Matthew 7:7

I’m not sure how things work in your life but here’s how they work in mine. A thought pops into my head or someone says something that resonates or riles me. I consider it. I ponder it. I turn it over in my mind a few times. Then I let it go. Sometimes, that’s the end of it. Other times, the next thing I know this idea keeps showing up over and over and over again. I see magazines while I’m waiting in line at the grocery store and there the idea is on multiple covers in bold headlines. I open my email, and there the idea is in not one but several blog posts over the course of several days. I run into a friend and they mention it in conversation. I see a tweet or a post on Facebook that relates to the topic.

When this starts to happen, I know it’s time to dive deep.

So, it was when I caught an interview with Danielle LaPorte. She said that when we ask the universe for what we want, we have to be like greedy children at Christmas. Initially, this didn’t sit well with me. The idea that I should be greedy just didn’t feel good to me. The idea that I should ask God / the Universe for exactly what I wanted no-holds-barred seemed a bit too presumptuous and just a little spoiled rotten to me. I let the idea go. But over the next couple of weeks this idea of asking, no of demanding, what you want cropped up over and over and over again. This idea had a hold of me.

During this time, I had a long conversation with a very good friend. Holly and I are both in similar places in our lives. We both are nearing the end of the “hands-on” portion of our child rearing duties, and we both are really looking forward to the next chapter in our lives and all that it will bring. The problem is that neither of us is quite sure what that next chapter is.

Like me, Holly has done stints in marketing, education, and as a stay at home mom.  She told me how she was seeking a new thing, about how she wants to do something that really serves others and the same time feeds her soul, about how excited and anxious she is for this thing to be here. I so know how she feels. This is what I want as well.

As I listened to Holly lament the direction she should take, I thought to myself that she just needs to be more specific and ask for it. As she questioned her abilities and knowledge, I thought to myself that she was being a bit ridiculous because she’s so exceptional at everything she does. I knew she was hesitating partly because she wasn’t sure, but also partly because she doesn’t feel she deserves it. I realized as I listened to her that I was listening to myself.

As I drove in the car with my daughter later that day, I was telling her about this asking for exactly what you want idea. I was explaining to her that a lot of really smart people, pretty much everyone from Jesus to Ghandi to Danielle LaPorte, said that doing this was a good way to create the future that you truly wanted. Of course, everyone agrees that you have to let go of expectations, and be open to variations, but first and foremost you have to ask.

As we continued down the road, my daughter asked me what I wanted. My heart tightened. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes.  I lied and said, “I don’t know.”

Here’s the thing. I do know. I just won’t ask. It feels greedy and rotten and spoiled. Who do I think I am, with my silly first world problems, to ask for what I want in specific detail. Who am I to dream? To reach? People are dying of horrible diseases and living in poverty and squalor that I can’t even imagine and being stifled under repressive regimes, and I’m going to have the nerve, the audacity to ask for more than I already have? How dare I?

But I know that this is the heart of the matter. I know this is what I have to do, where I have to be brave. I know that I have to stand in my truth and just ask. I know that I have to continue on this path of seeking what I want. Then I have to trust that when it’s right for me, I will receive.

(BTW…I couldn’t find the interview with Danielle, but you can visit her website by clicking here. If anyone remembers this interview, please forward me the link so I can include it.) (ALSO: Holly has started an amazing blog, and you can visit her by clicking here.)


  1. Denise, I believe the root of “not asking” is that vague (and untrue) thought: “I’m not worthy of asking.” I’ve struggled with it before, have believed the bogus crud that resulted, and struggled with it some more.

    Part of it may be the period of life you’re in (those last years prior to empty-nesting are demanding), but in the midst of it, your heart is crying out: “I deserve more.”

    I’m praying for you to reach the critical point where “what you want” and “what you believe” are one and the same. (Me, too!) Your heart’s desires are just as important as anyone else’s. You ARE worth it! Please ask… (I will, too.) This post was a prime example of the coincidental occurrences you mentioned… God/the Universe has soooo much more in store for both of us! (Sorry for the long comment, but THANKS for sharing your heart!)

  2. “Just keep asking etc” is the most accurate translation of Matthew 7:7. A noted theologian at one of Skip’s workshops echoed the same message. We are supposed to keep asking. Guilt isn’t from God, so once that’s gone we can commune and truly keep asking from the heart.

    • Skip is the first person I heard present the verse with the “ing” and is the version I like best. ; ) Those three little letters just change the WHOLE meaning. We have to remember that it’s not enough to ask once and then go off and complain. His message was a pivotal moment in my life. My love to you both.

  3. Oh my gosh, I’m famous! I’m so honored to be mentioned in your wonderful blog. When I saw my name, I got nervous. My heart started pounding. I thought, “Oh no, what’s she going to say about me??” As I read on, my heart pounded harder. “What does she mean, I just need to be more specific and ask for it?” I thought a bit indignantly. “What? Now she’s saying I’m being a bit ridiculous?” hmph! But, as usual, everything you said totally resonated with me, and I’m going to take the HUGE compliment (that I’m so exceptional at everything I do) and savor it, and I’m going to take this blog entry as one of those special messages from the universe that I’ve been asking for, and give it some serious thought. The very fact that it made my heart pound the whole time I was reading tells me it’s MY time to dive deep. Thank you, as always, for you amazing insight.

    • Dude, you did see the line where I said, “I realized as I listened to her that I was listening to myself.” Your gift to me was being able to see and hear myself in your words. We are going to be better than ok because we’re in this together along with a whole lot of other amazing women. I’m honored to be in such great company. BTW….I still haven’t asked. Trying to get my courage up. It’ll take a bit more.

  4. One of my favorite topics! Asking for what we want requires us to get specific and that’s dangerous to our inner chicken – because once we get specific and we can feel it, taste it and smell it the dreamer in us demands us to take action. I love how our inner characters fight to be in the driver’s seat. Juicy post Denise.

  5. I truly loved this entry, Denise. I struggle with this too but needed to be reminded that it’s as simple as you say…. just ask. Thank you for so beautifully putting into words what my heart has been feeling. It really hit home!

    • Thank you for reading, Kathy. I’m glad it resonated with you. It’s still a struggle for me, but we just have to keep going. Maybe, it’ll get easier.


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